Me and My Nine Iron

September 25, 2012

Millionaire (only in America)

In July, Yahoo! posted an article it considered ten of the toughest games. From this list, I went on to play one of them, a computer game as stupid as it is difficult. (If you haven’t heard of it.)

QWOP

After introducing it to my two friends, we spent a night beating it. Well, my one friend went 100 yards dragging his right leg the whole way, but it was deemed fine by the game.

After you give up on that, check out this funny GIF.

A hilarious look into LeBron James‘ email account from the guy who wrote Sh*t My Dad Says, Justin Halpern.

Last Wednesday, a Denver man was awarded $7.2 million for being diagnosed with “popcorn lung,” possibly from inhaling the artificial butter smell of the microwave popcorn he ate. This has got to be up there with the McDonald’s hot coffee lawsuit, which had just a $2.9 million verdict, because the man kind of asked for it, eating two to three bags of microwave popcorn every day for ten years.

In a post-verdict interview, he remarks that he “probably looks like a fairly healthy guy.” Yeah, I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t find anyone to agree with you, but have fun with your millions.

BJ

September 24, 2012

Gangnam Style

My friend only heard about this song in the last week so for those of you still living under a rock, here is the man blowing up around the world – Korean rap star Psy, short for Psycho. And yes, I’m proud to be Korean because of this man.

I’m not even going to post how many hundreds of millions of views this video’s gotten because that number will be trumped in a week. In just over two months, it’s cracked the top 20 most-viewed videos of all-time on YouTube and even plays on American radio stations.

A remix was released a month later featuring Hyuna, the featured girl in Psy’s original video and a 20-year-old K-Pop star herself, although her voice is annoyingly high in this version.

Dodgers Stadium

Psy came to the U.S. to work with Justin Bieber and signed with his manager, Scooter Braun. Just like the Canadian Internet sensation before him, Carly Rae Jepsen.

The Ellen DeGeneres Show

In case you missed him at any of these high-profile appearances.

P.S. Britney Spears is a horrible dancer.

Saturday Night Live

Summer Stand Live Concert

If you couldn’t feel the electricity of a hundred thousand fans jumping up and down to that song from your monitor, you weren’t paying attention.

TODAY Show

I’m convinced this man can end all the hate in this world. The power of music.

And my favorite appearance…

Chelsea Lately

Plus appearances on VH1, ABC, the MTV VMAs and countless and continuing appearances across the U.S. I’m sincerely happy for his success.

BJ

September 21, 2012

R.I.P. Tony Scott

On August 7, Arrested Development started shooting new episodes, and this one of Michael Cera as an Anteater (zot! zot!) was released – looking awkward as ever on a Segway. Awesome.

I came across this Dear Abby question, and I couldn’t not talk about it.

DEAR ABBY: One night I woke up to my cat scratching at my bedroom door to be let in. When I got up and opened the door, I heard my parents making love. They were so loud it grossed me out, because my little sister is 10 and we share a room right next to theirs. She still doesn’t know about this kind of stuff.

It goes on to ask what she should do, but here’s the dumbass response this poor girl got.

DEAR GROSSED OUT: Do not tell your parents to go to a motel. If the cat hadn’t wakened you and you hadn’t opened your bedroom door, you wouldn’t have heard a thing. Be glad that you have parents who love each other and that you didn’t overhear them fighting.

If your sister ever wakes up and gets scared, she should know she can wake you up.

P.S. At age 10, your sister shouldn’t be completely in the dark about the facts of life. And the person who should be talking to her about them is her mother.

The fact that the cat woke her up is irrelevant. If she were to get up to go to the bathroom, she would’ve heard it also. It’s not like she put her ear by her parents’ door and tried to hear it. They’re not allowed to be as loud as they want just because it’s a good thing that’s not fighting. That’s the stupidest reason ever. And I would much prefer to hear my parents fight than have sex. But that’s just me.

I also disagree that a 10-year-old can go on in life without learning about sex and reproduction, but if need be, how would her mother know to talk about it when stupid Abby told her daughter to keep her mouth shut? I say let it go the first time, but if it keeps happening, slam the door as loud as possible. The end. They seriously let anyone give advice. Send your burning questions my way, and I’ll answer them better than this iconic broad.

Finally, R.I.P. to Tony Scott, who committed suicide on August 19 at the age of 68. The shocking nature of the director-producer’s death–by jumping off a bridge in L.A. infamous for jumpers–was made even more tragic when a source claimed he had inoperable brain cancer. However, that was later refuted by his family.

The crazy thing about Ridley Scott‘s younger brother is that he had a very illustrious career, was very much working with over three dozen projects in development and had never been busier than in his last two years. It’s too bad those questions of why will go unanswered. I know it sounds crazy, but it feels like we lost one in the family. R.I.P.

  • Top Gun (director)
  • Beverly Hills Cop II (director)
  • The Last Boy Scout (director)
  • True Romance (director)
  • Crimson Tide (director)
  • The Fan (director)
  • Clay Pigeons (executive producer)
  • Enemy of the State (director)
  • Spy Game (director)
  • Man on Fire (director, producer)
  • Numb3rs (TV Series) (executive producer)
  • Deja Vu (director)
  • The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford (executive producer)
  • The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3 (director, producer)
  • The Good Wife (TV Series) (executive producer)
  • Cyrus (executive producer)
  • The A-Team (producer)
  • Unstoppable (director, producer)
  • The Grey (executive producer)
  • Prometheus (producer)
  • The East (producer)
  • Stoker (executive producer)
  • Out of the Furnace (producer)
  • Prometheus 2 (producer) (announced)

BJ

September 20, 2012

Movie reviews

Friends with Benefits

This movie put all of its chips on the quick banter, wittiness and chemistry between Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis, and it lost. There was hardly a laugh in the entire first act, and only the most amazing ending could’ve saved the slow and almost boring first half – which it wasn’t.

A disappointing follow-up to Easy A, 2010’s charming hit comedy, for Will Gluck, who wrote, directed and produced this movie. Well, except for the fact that it made $150 million. But an obvious pass when given a similar movie that came out at the same time was much better. Check out No Strings Attached instead, which I actually found favorable.

Rating: 2 stars out of 5

IMDb rating: 6.6
What it should be: 6.1

Pass

Our Idiot Brother

A fun, light-hearted movie about an idealistic hippie who indeliberately ruins everyone’s lives. The story beats were great, and Paul Rudd plays a classic idiot. That being said, it wasn’t the most fulfilling movie because the protagonist has no character arc whatsoever and the ending is a little tame. Still, if you’re looking for a popcorn movie, it’s definitely enjoyable.

Rating: 4 stars out of 5

IMDb rating: 6.5
What it should be: 6.5

Consider

B.o.B. – Strange Clouds

No sophomore slump here. In fact, this easily tops his debut album, The Adventures of Bobby Ray, which was good in its own right. I don’t skip a single track, and all the choruses are so good with top featured artists like Taylor Swift, Lil Wayne, Chris Brown and Nicki Minaj. Definitely an underrated rapper with a good voice, good flow and great lyrics.

Favorite tracks: Ray Bands, Strange Clouds, So Good, Arena

Rating: 5 stars out of 5

Recommend

John Mayer – Born and Raised

A polarizing album, or maybe more accurately, I’m the only one that likes it. Considered folk, a little on the soft side (even for John Mayer) but the hardest part to like about it is the lyrics and music, which have some harsh harmonica sounds. At least in its 2009 predecessor, Battle Studies, the album was all about a girl. This one’s about not-as-interesting stuff.

Again, I’m the only one who finds it an easy listen so it’s not for all John Mayer fans. I do question the stupidity of some of the lyrics, and maybe, the tell-tale track for those trying to decide is Love Is A Verb. Shadow Days is about the only catchy beat, and it still misses the mark from being a classic John Mayer song. I still prefer songs about Jane.

Favorite tracks: Shadow Days, Something Like Olivia, Love Is A Verb

Rating: 4 stars out of 5

Pass

BJ

September 19, 2012

Movies and real life

Filed under: For your pleasure — BJ @ 9:58 pm
Tags: ,

I imagine a filmmaker would think twice about shooting something that is very sensitive to the state of the current events. (Unless your name is Sam Bacile.) But finished movies are a whole different story, and for that reason, unless we’re talking 9/11, current events should not be the reason to delay the release, change the title or cut a scene in a finished movie.

At the end of the day, Hollywood is still a business trying to sell a product, and maybe more importantly, movies are permanent and for them to change because of something that happened in the news that won’t hold up in history like the movie itself is a calamity.

The most unfortunate timing has changed two movies this year that should be remembered as something else: The Watch and Gangster Squad.

The Watch

The change: Originally titled Neighborhood Watch.

The news: Trayvon Martin gets shot to death in a gated community where the neighborhood watch coordinator had a fatal encounter with him.

The verdict: There weren’t any other changes to the film or its release date because the movie was not about a Hispanic man killing a black kid in mysterious conditions. It was about a group of guys fending off aliens. Should’ve left the title, which was released five months after the incident.

Gangster Squad

The change: An integral scene where the characters shoot submachine guns at moviegoers through a theater screen, and in order for a recut/reshoot, consequently, the release date from September 7, 2012 to January 11, 2013.

The news: The Aurora shooting, where the killer fired at moviegoers during a midnight screening of The Dark Knight Rises.

The verdict: Originally scheduled to be released a month and a half after the incident, a damn shame a movie had to be changed because of something that happened right before it was going to come out. I say push the release date, keep the setting, as they’re keeping the shooting and considering moving the movie theater setting.

(2:00 – 2:09)

I’m surprised they didn’t change Premium Rush (2:16) because of a fatal car accident with a bike where the driver was drunk or something.

But maybe because the media didn’t give it national attention.

BJ

September 18, 2012

Pics pt. 5

Filed under: For your pleasure — BJ @ 12:01 am
Tags:

Re-post from my Facebook friends:

Right?

For those that follow the Lakers and their ridiculous ability to take all the star players.

Dora is Consuela. Duh.

BJ

September 17, 2012

Mondays

Carl Crawford, the victim. The $20 million player has since been traded to the Dodgers.

In July, the Massachusetts mayor elected to fire an officer for a racial slur of a baseball player while off-duty at a baseball game. The racial slur in question? A Monday – a use of the word I don’t know anyone I know has ever heard before. The origin:

The word can be used as a derogatory term for blacks, and is often associated with Mondays being one of the most-hated days of the week, such as in the common phrase, ”I hate Mondays.”

First of all, that has got to be the stupidest, least offensive racial slur out of all the races there is. Seriously, that’s something a third-grader would say. The player was immediately offended by it so I’m guessing he knew what that meant, but c’mon. For a race that seems to be the most fiery and physically tough, they’re easily the most sensitive. In fact, I can assure you I just offended someone reading this right now.

Shouldn’t have been said out of sheer lack of creativity and should’ve been a non-issue for the same reason.

Holly Madison will end her run on Las Vegas’ Peepshow on October 21 to focus on adopting a baby from either Africa or South Korea.

Just adopt me. We can pretend I’m from Korea, and we can forgo all the diaper troubles, unless you want to. Looking forward to making babies with my adopted mother.

Update: Madison is pregnant with her boyfriend of less than a year. What was interesting was she said this back in June, “I’m not pregnant right now,” the former Playboy model, 32, said, “but if that happened tomorrow I’d be fine with it.” Looks like it literally did; she conceived in June.

Madison’s boyfriend is actually currently facing up to 13 years in prison on charges of bribery and embezzlement. Sounds like an upstanding dude. If you need help, Holly, holler.

They say the bigger you are, the harder the fall. That couldn’t be more true for two stars who made just one mistake in their personal life that ended up costing them dearly, simultaneously: Chad Johnson, formerly Chad Ochocinco, NFL player and reality TV star, and Kristen Stewart, the highest-paid actress in the last year ($34.5 million).

Johnson’s bad week:

8/11 Arrested for allegedly headbutting his wife, Evelyn Lozada, during an argument which arose from her finding a receipt for a box of condoms.
8/12 Released from the Miami Dolphins for being arrested.
8/13 VH1’s Ev and Ocho, set to premiere in September, is dropped.
8/14 The episode when he was released by the head coach on HBO’s Hard Knocks airs. His wife files for divorce.
8/15 Loses an endorsement deal with coconut water brand Zico.

Update: 9/14 Johnson files for divorce.

Stewart’s bad month:

7/17 Caught by photographers cheating on her boyfriend Robert Pattinson, with her Snow White and the Huntsman director, Rupert Sanders.
7/22 Stewart and Pattinson argue at the Teen Choice Awards.
7/25 Issues public apology.
7/26 Pattinson moves out of their shared home.
8/14 Universal Pictures scraps plans to make a Snow White and the Huntsman sequel and instead will make a movie about The Huntsman.
8/28 Pattinson puts home up for sale.

Update: 9/16 Stewart and Pattinson are back together.

At least one of them had a happy ending. And that includes Sanders and his now-estranged wife, Liberty Ross. I can’t imagine the gifts Sanders is going to shower Ross with on her birthday this Sunday.

BJ

September 13, 2012

Trouble with the Curve review

Filed under: Movie reviews — BJ @ 11:51 am
Tags:

Seen at a pre-release screening in Los Angeles:

A very average drama and very much a sports movie. I can see non-baseball fans getting very uninterested and even bored at all the lingo and baseball action while the strained relationship between father and daughter felt contrived and was never fully satisfied. Clint Eastwood, who felt he was done acting after Gran Torino, plays the same bitter old character that is nowhere near as good as the earlier movie or last year’s baseball drama, Moneyball.

The fatal weakness lied in the annoyingly brief exchanges between father and daughter, where they have the same conversation over and over again. Also, I spotted a handful of baseball inaccuracies that could’ve easily been avoided, and the ending was a little gimmicky.

Otherwise, it’s a decent watch with an inevitable and fun relationship between Amy Adams and Justin Timberlake, who by the way, reminded me of Will Smith in this movie. He’s getting that comfortable and confident in front of the camera now, and he can pull it off. Looking forward to seeing him next year in the Coen brothers‘ next movie, Inside Llewyn Davis, and a crime movie with Ben Affleck, Runner, Runner.

Trouble with the Curve opens in theaters on September 21.

Rating: 3 stars out of 5

IMDb rating: n/a
What it should be: 7.0

Pass

BJ

September 12, 2012

The Words review

Filed under: Movie reviews — BJ @ 9:47 am
Tags:

Seen at a pre-release screening in Los Angeles:

How unfulfilling. First, consider its logline.

A writer at the peak of his literary success discovers the steep price he must pay for stealing another man’s work.

SPOILER ALERT: I hate to ruin it for you guys, but the man whose original work it was wants nothing upon confronting the plagiarist while the “steep price” he must pay is guilt. Would’ve been better off as a book or a thriller.

The scenes that were supposed to be filled with tension missed the mark emotionally, and you had the one guy when asked what he wanted in return reply, “I just needed you to know.” Which genius thought that line was going to make the audience happy?

Bradley Cooper plays the struggling author who comes across an undiscovered story he then writes as his own. His relationship with Zoe Saldana is the only good part of the movie. You wait for something to happen with his encounter with Jeremy Irons, and after Irons tells him it’s his story, he just leaves. Especially in a story where you would think there would be a high cost for stealing another man’s work, it was all a self-evaluation, something that usually never comes across well in a movie.

I’ll admit I enjoyed it, but only because it was very relatable as a writer. Otherwise, I can’t disagree with any of the negative reviews I read.

The Words opened in theaters on Friday.

Rating: 3 stars out of 5

IMDb rating: 6.7
What it should be: 6.7

Pass

BJ

September 11, 2012

The Possession review

Filed under: Movie reviews — BJ @ 9:55 am
Tags:

Seen at a pre-release screening in Pico Rivera:

I was surprised at how the story decided to turn the way it did towards the end, but when I stop to think of the title, I guess it makes sense. It could’ve easily been called The Jewish Exorcism, and minus the Jewish, haven’t we all seen an exorcism movie? That’s not to say it wasn’t good. It definitely wasn’t the entire movie, and it certainly didn’t ruin the movie.

Not too scary of a horror flick but a fun one, and well, who doesn’t like a little girl terrorizing everyone? Well noted are the quick cuts from the shocking scenes, the contrast an excellent execution not too often done in horror movies.

Admittedly, for genre fans only. Here’s an agreeable excerpt from an IMDb user:

In the end, this movie is a solid but not outstanding flick for genre fans that convinces with a gripping atmosphere, a solid acting and some intriguing elements around Jewish culture, lifestyle and religion which one doesn’t see that often in popular movies. The weaker parts such as a predictable story line, some too generic interpersonal tension filled relations and a couple of notable lengths in the beginning are definitely there but the positive elements are still dominating. It’s definitely not a classic but despite its flaws an enjoyable flick worth to be watched for a reduced price at your local cinema if you happen to like this kind of films.

To give further validation and to discredit the poor reviews, surprisingly high but not disagreeable reviews from critics: Roger Ebert gave the film 3.5 out of 4 stars. Richard Roeper also gave the movie a B+.

The Possession is now playing in theaters.

Rating: 4 stars out of 5

IMDb rating: 6.1
What it should be: 7.1

Consider

BJ

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